March 22, 2017

Time Bedore - Standing Up

Best of Vague But True Vol 2

The Animal Conspiracy CD

Bear Takes Out Motorcycle
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YAKIMA, Washington- The Yakima County sheriff's office says a man riding a motorcycle collided with a bear crossing the road, who acted like it had the right of way. The Yakima-area man was taken to a hospital with serious rib injuries. The sheriff's office says the bear did not appear to be hurt and wandered off from the scene. While Greg Grossman lay on the road trying to gather himself he told deputies he saw the bear stare at him, shake his head, snort derisively, and then walk off.
Feral Pigs Hog Beach, Ruin Caribbean Vacation
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NASSAU, Bahamas- Feral pigs have taken over the beach on Big Major Island. And some tourists have had it. "We didn't come down here to swim with pigs," said Jimmy Krandlehoff of Mason City, Iowa. "We paid a ton of money for this vacation just to end up swimming with pigs." Krandlehoff raises hogs on his Iowa farm.
"Can We Have Our Ball Back?"
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KISSAPIPPEE, Florida- A family picnic/reunion was disrupted by a determined carp that kept stealing a ball from a large group of frightened children."If it was just once you'd say it was a freak accident but this fish was like an All-American corner back intercepting passes," said Slim Grabbee. "That thing scooted all over the field and just ruined their good time," said the frustrated father.
"It Ruined My Summer"
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PISMO BEACH, California- Parsley Abel was surfing away her last summer before college when a shark, thought to be a great white, took a bite out of her board. "Before getting serious and all life-oriented I wanted to have one last good time summer and now it's ruined. No way I go back out in the water and once September comes my life is over," said the local wave rider.
Bear Loves Indoors
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IRON MOUNTAIN, Michigan- A black bear just won't stay out of Sue Frumritter's house and it is hurting her love life. "I've done everything I can think of, but this bear just keeps breaking in, pushing open doors, windows... it just likes being in my house. I have to change my profile on e-harmony to include 'Lives with big hairy room-mate.'"
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