June 25, 2017

Time Bedore - Standing Up

Best of Vague But True Vol 2

The Animal Conspiracy CD

Hammerheads Hammer Vacationers
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CHRISTO DE LAS CRUCES, Mexico- The average experienced scuba diver gets 45 minutes or so from a tank of air. And the inexperienced Richard C. Johnson family of Houston, Texas needed all 45 and then some on their first dive during a Cozumel vacation. "We told the guide we had never done this before but they said no problemo. Suddenly we were sitting on the bottom and believe it or not we could tell the gestures the guy was making meant 'Breathe really slowly.' We did. Every hammerhead in the world seemed to pass by. By the time we could surface we were holding our breath."
Bear Tells Hunter To Leave Deer Alone
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LAC DU FLAMBEAU, Wisconsin- Dennis Corrigan was about to climb up into his deer stand when he heard noise coming from above. When he looked up he saw, sitting on the perch he intended to shoot deer from, a very unwilling to move black bear. "We looked at each other for awhile and it was obvious that bear did not intend to move. So I went home and mowed the lawn."
"They Just Love Each Other"
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WHITE CAP, Vermont- Generally, raptors and water fowl are not seen together or treat each other very well when they are in the same space. But an eagle and a swan that frequent Diebold Lake are not just friendly, they seem to be in love. "What it looks like they're doing up there is, well... what else can you call it? They're trying to make little eagle-swan babies," said birder Nathan Nayman. "I have seen them flying around, flirting with one another," said the amateur ornithologist, "and it's progressed to this. You just can't mistake that position, that motion... it's multi-species bird sex. I've never seen it before but recognized it immediately."
Ball-Peen Hammer Saves Woman From Murderous Deer
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PRESTON, Idaho- Sue Panter was screaming to God to not let her die when Michael Vaughan and his 17-year-old daughter Alexis rushed in and saved her life. Panter had gone for a morning jog when a deer came out of a corn field and started running along side her for an eerie amount of time. "It ran parallel with me with its head lowered so I knew I was going down. It was just a matter of time," Panter said. Then the deer charged at Panter, throwing her off the road into the corn field. Panter played dead, hoping the diabolical deer would quit piercing her legs with its antlers but "When it stuck its antler through my neck I decided, if I don't fight back I'm dead." And that's when Michael and Alexis showed up. Alexis jumped out and started punching the deer which responding by turning on her Dad, stabbing him in the leg over and over. So, Alexis grabbed a hammer from the car and bonked the deer on its noggin until it ran off into the cornfield. Fish and Game officials say if people confront this deer they should not try to kill it themselves but if they are going to using a hammer instead of a gun is safer for the public at large.
'Gator Ruins Wisconsin Camping Trip
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PRESCOTT, Wisconsin- Derrick Radke and his fiancť were out for a relaxing weekend on the Mississippi River and had pulled up to shore, to pitch a tent. Thatís when Radke noticed what he thought was a muskrat swimming toward them. But as it got closer they realized the brazen creature wasn't a muskrat, it looked a lot more like a three-foot-long alligator. "I never thought I would say these words here in Wisconsin but I blurted out, 'Oh my god, that's an alligator.'" The fearless 'gator ended up sunning itself on a log jam in the channel while the humans went looking for help. When explaining to sheriffs in a nearby river patrol boat that he had just seen an alligator Radke first thought, "They were going to ask me to pee in a cup, but I had a picture on my iPhone to prove it." he said. With police backup he and McKenna began packing up their camping gear. "It was her first camping trip, and I think it is going to be her last. She was worried about all kinds of things being out there and the first animal we see wasn't even on her list," Radke said.
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