April 29, 2017

Time Bedore - Standing Up

Best of Vague But True Vol 2

The Animal Conspiracy CD

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VINYL CLASSICS President Rick Rettler boasts about his new release IT''S ME MUM, WALLY WHYTON, that "Whyton was bigger in England than the Beatles and now we have his best record." Truth be told Whyton was only bigger than the Beatles because the decidely odd folk singer preceded the Fab Four by a few years on the English Music scene. But there is no doubt IT'S ME MUM, WALLY WHYTON deserves a listen from vinyl collectors because of Whyton's most talked about tune "Don't Send My Mother To Prison." Of this bizarre track Rettler said "It's the strangest thing I have ever heard. You play this at a party, you'll be talking about it the rest of the night. You might have bad dreams. It's that weird" SEND FOR YOURS TODAY- FROM VINYL CLASSICS
Mad Cow Loves To Lick
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POLONIA, Wisconsin- This isn't a story about mad cow disease. This is a story about a cow, named Betsy, that when mad licks the face of whatever or whomever made her mad. "I should turn her into burger, she is one pain in my butt," said owner Mike Zaksewski. "If she doesn't feel like being milked she licks me, my wife, my kids, it's gross. I grew up on a farm, not much gets to me, I have seen it all, but having cow saliva all up and down your face... that cow is going to be burger."
Sharks Vacation in California
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LAGUNA VISTA, California- Sharks exist in all oceans of the world but have never been much of a problem in Southern California waters. Until now that is. Swimmers have been bitten recently by adult great white sharks as well as other species and swarms of sharks are now commonly seen off Southern California's most popular beaches. "If swimmers could see what we see from the helicopter they'd never get out of the car," said Los Angeles County Lifeguard Patrol pilot Jimmy Morin. "When we fly up and down the beach we radio in Luca Brazzi conditions. They all are swimming with the fishes... the big ones."
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NEW FROM VINYL CLASSICS If you remember when Pintos were considered safe and hair spray was for men, too, then you remember when work outs first became fun. And who was it that made aerobics into a jazzy good time- Lionel Blair! That's why VINYL CLASSICS is proud to bring this classic LP back to the masses. Forget videos, get in shape to Lionel Blaire on pure vinyl. Discounts available for assisted living facilities.
"Don't Lie to Mommy, There Aren't Four Bears in Our Tree"
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WAUSAU, Wisconsin- Parenting is hard enough but it's especially hard when there really are four bear cubs in your tree according to Mary Beth Holtz. "I demand my kids tell the truth so I guess I am hyper sensitive to exaggerations and the other day my youngest, Annie, tells me to come look, there's four bears in our tree. And I start quoting the Bible and telling her not to lie and... well, when I finally had it with her insisting I walked into the living room... there were four bears in our tree. Now Annie thinks she can tell me anything and I have to believe it. This is a nightmare."
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