June 25, 2017

Time Bedore - Standing Up

Best of Vague But True Vol 2

The Animal Conspiracy CD

No Anchovies Please
TAKAHARI, Japan- A wild Japanese macaque seems to have been ordering pizza from an iPhone. Whether the phone was stolen or found is uncertain but the macaque has been trying to order American style pizza from it. The former owner of the iPhone, Shinya Miyakoshi, an avid hiker, says he either lost the waterproof cased phone while hiking or that the monkey snuck up and picked his pocket. Biologists have asked Miyakoshi to keep his account active to see if the monkey learns how to do more than punch up the last number Miyakoshi called, which was to order pizza. The pizza parlor says they love trying to talk to the monkey and if they could ever figure out what type of pizza he wants they will be happy to oblige.
Shark Nearly Ruins Vacation
TEABERRY, Australia- Taking pictures while on your vacation is a time honored tradition. Photo-bombing, jumping into the picture frame while someone is taking a picture, is a social media aged tradition. But, in perhaps a first of its kind, a vacation photo, and almost an entire vacation, was ruined by the sudden emergence of a Great White Shark. Mary Kay Clark and her husband Dean were swimming near the Great Barrier Reef and having a grand time until Dean nearly lost his head to the photo-bombing Great White. "We went from being great adventurers snorkeling the Great Barrier Reef to sitting by the hotel pool all day. In fact, once the shark showed up Dean couldn't wait to get back to Wisconsin."
Giraffe French Kisses Honeymooner

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BUTTSNAATI, Botswana- For most couples their wedding night is no longer the first time they have sex but certainly their honeymoon is supposed to be a very romantic time. For one happily married couple the honeymoon mood was ruined by, of all things, a French kiss from a giraffe. Rick and Katie Rettler were posing at a wildlife park and not only got photo bombed by a giraffe but Rick also got a giant French kiss. "I don't know why but I just couldn't kiss Rick till we got back to America," said Katie. "And if there's no kissin' there's no sex, so... that was that." Her husband added, "Yes, that was that."
Tree Climbing Crocs

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KISSIMEPEEPEE, Florida- Alligators and crocodiles and Floridians have long lived together without too many problems. What will make things more problematic though is when the giant meat eating reptilians climb trees and drop down onto unsuspecting humans. "I was out fishing, drifting in my canoe and looked up and there was this big croc right over me. Looked like it was ready to bounce, too," said Howie Klein. The long time fisherman added, "Ain't never seen crocs or gators in trees but it's advantage them if they can climb up there so now I'll have to have one eye on the water and one on the trees."
"Our Kids Won't Go To School"

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WANCOVIA, Washington- When humans move their homes further and further out into the wild they should expect to come in contact with wildlife. But what is unexpected is to have wildlife camp out on your doorstep. Yet, that's exactly what has happened to Larry and Tara Bookin. "We wanted to raise our kids away from the city, out in nature but after they saw this mountain lion on our front porch they won't leave the house," said Larry. "If it is there or not, they won't go out." The Bookins are home schooling their kids for the rest of the semester.
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