August 21, 2017
An SUV Gets Stuck in a Flower Bed
I saw the funniest thing the other day that was "so L.A." and a wonderful argument against SUVs.

I was walking through the grocery store parking lot and a woman, driving one of the biggest, mammoth, luxury SUVs had cut a turn too short (which is easy to do in those tanks) and her rear tire had gone up and over a median-curb thing and was now in a rut of muddy grass. And she was stuck. She had no idea what to do. So, she had her husband on the cell phone and store employees putting wood planks under her tires.

Mind you, she had three tires on dry pavement but she still had no idea how to use the SUV part of her SUV to drive off that tricky four inch tall mound of mud and curb. For the first time in her life she used her SUV to go off road and now had no idea what to do out there in the wilderness.

And, literally all she had to do was hit the gas. Three of her tires were on asphalt. Obviously this woman (like most SUV owners out here) do not use the SUV part of their SUV. The SUV part of these vehicles is just wasteful and useless and completely unnecessary.

So, I was telling this story to a friend, a self-described libertarian (which means he's a conservative who won't admit it), and he launched into a tirade about how Barbra Streisand travels around L.A. in a Winnebago so she won't have to use public restrooms and Norman Lear has a huge wasteful vanity ranch consuming copious amounts of energy and liberals are hypocrites flying around in their private jets and telling the rest of us to sell our SUVs. And I said, if so, then they're wrong too.

I'm not saying any of these people are evil. I just think we as a nation have stopped thinking.

We need to be critical thinkers on this issue. And let's start with celebrities with bladder infections. Do we as a nation really want to see Barbra Streisand limping out of a Honda Civic, running up to the attendant at an Arco station and screaming for the key to the washroom? Actually, yes. But if she doesn't stop driving her Winnebago, if indeed she has one, it still doesn't mean your SUV is anything but big-time silly and bad for America.